Im rereading Crime and Punishment by Dostoyevsky because the first time I read was about 12 years ago and I remember enjoying the book but I couldn’t remember anything about it other than SPOILER ALERT Raskolnikov murdering an old women. As I started to get lost in the chapters I remembered the first time I read the book I was more interested in finishing the book as an accomplishment rather than enjoying the experience of climbing inside the mind of a murderous madman. I suppose its the equivalent of going to Paris and getting your picture at the Eiffel Tower to post on Facebook but forgetting to enjoy the walk around the park, haggling for a bottle of wine with an arab teenager, tasting a fresh croissant and sketching your own memory of the experience.

One thing Im beginning to focus on is having patience and enjoying my journey threw life. It seems like everything around me is being abridged: TV shows that have four, 5 min sketches in an episode #Brooklyn99 , text messages taking the place of actual conversations and dating sites built around 1 second pass/fail picture qualifications.#Tinder The struggle of the journey is the story I have become more interested in than just the view from the summit. The time and effort that it took to overcome hardship is where character is formed. I look around at people who just complain about why they have not and their answer is always the same its someone else’s fault.

Its too easy to blame society or the internet for all this. iBlame myself for occasionally getting caught up in this instant oatmeal throw away mentality. Shaking my finger at everyone for being addicted to social media while I scroll threw my newsfeed is hypocrisy at its finest but hey Im a Rich White Republican #RWR so I’m afforded that luxury. In the past we seemed to equate happiness to material reminders now we post digital reminders. The true problem is we are a society that values achievement without effort and having no personal accountability or standards.

When you “spread the wealth” of value to everything you find it’s easier to say good bye and the ultimate aim in this pursuit is to be absolutely devoid of materialism. Which I feel has made us more petty because we now tend to value all things the same… like shit. We collect clothes, cars, toys, girlfriend’s, boyfriends and pride ourselves in not putting any value on anything… It’s all replaceable. Fuck that!!! If I label something as mine I take care of it and responsibility for it. Whether its my car or my reputation I own both. The high I receive when I earn something in life can’t be bought on the street and the feeling I receive when I loss friends or say goodbye to my children is pain… but its a beautiful pain. It’s a pain that shows that I care about something or someone more than my own personal satisfaction. The sacrifices I make to and for them and all things I value is a representation of what they mean to me. You can’t earn something once and rest on that past glory or that prize will slip away. You have to go out and earn it everyday.

So value and take pride in Your Country, Your Culture, Your Job, Your Faith, Your Family and Your Wife/Husband. All of which are Yours and all of which are a reflection of You. Life is not a rush to collect a bunch of shit that doesn’t matter stop hitting fast forward and enjoy the time and experience at hand because food spoils, clothes go out of fashion, youth fades and the finish line is a funeral hopefully attended by people who valued you.

PS Communism is Bullshit