My plan for peace in Iraq,
America has been at War for 13 years and is in the process of cutting back on the size of its active force. Many of the men who were downsized or left due to the frustration of fighting a political war are now out of work. These men are having difficulty finding comparable employment. Going from experts in their field to now starting over because the skill they mastered doesn’t translate well to the civilian sector. That skill is KILLING evil men.
These Veterans still have honor, discipline and the greatest military training in history. These Champions of Justice are also going crazy to get back to work stopping the slaughter of innocence. Our “leaders” and celebrities like to imagine that evil men can be reasoned with. When the reality of it is the only way to deal with ISIS is to hunt them down, murder them all and bury them in unmarked graves so they can be erased from the annals of history. 
The puppet regimes that are being put in place have proved impotent in stopping the spread of radical islam and providing stability to the region. My proposal is to allow a company to employ these Warriors to go in and do the work that needs to be done. Once all of those animals have been dealt with the companies tasked to liberate stay on as an independent force that guards the Oil fields and other precious resources. They would then take a percentage of the revenues from the government to provide protection and stability to the region. 
The use of highly trained professionals for protection is already being used not only by our government #Academi #TripleCanopy #DynoCorp etc. but also our celebrities at home. #GavinDeBecker
I think it’s an understatement to say America is tired of War. Nobody wants to commit our time and resources into another potential quagmire where we as a nation see no political or economic gain. With that said I can’t imagine anyone can look at the atrocities being committed by ISIS and just go about their day without anger, disgust and a desire to see those savages brought to justice. The American government and it’s civilians may not have the stomach for what needs to be done. But, there are Heroes if properly equipped, supported and paid would gladly put an end to this Genocide and bring stability to the region. 
If the world stands by and does nothing, the blood of the innocent will be on the hands of us all. 
This is evil that can not be reasoned with.

I troll around Facebook while deployed to have a window open to America. What do I see? New Cars, Flexed Arms and Deep V-cut cocktail dresses. You know what I think Fan-fucking-tastic Get Paid, Lift Heavy and Giggity. I’m happy to see people proud of what they earned or paid for. In my opinion, Happiness should be a cup that is always overflowing.
The fact that I’m trying to wax philosophically about facebook status’ or stati. ‪#‎Whatever‬ Shows how fucking bored I am and how far I’ve fallen. I bring about this whole line of thought because I’m curious how people perceive me through my fb account. Am I some international playboy who hangs out with models (Male and Female) and dranks all the dranks? Am I a good father who sweeps into town to take my rad children on awesome adventures? Or, Am I a drunken, drug addled degenerate‪#‎SayThat3TimesFast‬ who runs around Afghanistan murdering babies and occasionally comes back to the States to pop into peoples lives, wreak havoc then leave again? In truth, in some ways I’m all 3. Except I only kill babies that are highly political and pose a serious threat to our national security. JK I kill all babies…
When I was a Reconnaissance Marine there were 2 things I enjoyed: Pre and Post deployment leave. 
Pre-deployment leave was like a funeral in that it was a somber celebration of life and coming to terms with your mortality. 
Post-Deployment leave was like a wedding celebrating, a triumphant return to be surrounded by the ones you love. The gnarly thing about constantly rotating back and forth from deployment is how I get to ride both waves. Which makes for some choppy surf. ‪#‎MaybeIHaveLivedInCA2Long‬
The Deployment itself wasn’t reality it was like living on the Moon (it even had the same landscape). It was a wretched horrible meal that we were served, but it has flavored everything else I’ve ever done. Like a bottle of Tapatio for my soul. To me PTSD is the inability to reintegrate back into society after experiencing something unique. I don’t attach it to War. I attach it to knowledge. After you fight in combat or fly into space sharing your experience with others is like talking to a virgin about sex. Whether people see you as a hero or a villain the problem lies in that civilians don’t see you as an equal, and those who struggle the most don’t see themselves as equal either. When I talk to my friends who have transitioned to a well paying stateside job they are envious of me because I found a way back to War in Afghanistan. I feel envious of them because they found Peace in America.
For those who think I live a fairytale life of money, women and travel, You’re wrong. In reality it’s a fucking nightmare. When I am in America I am constantly moving and dividing my time so many ways and to so many people I never have any time to face myself. I neglect every relationship of real value so that it’s easier to leave. Oh and to top it off I live in Afghanistan. It’s the only place where I feel healthy. Everything I do is for the betterment of myself and my team. Work out, Eat-Clean, Stay sober, Read books etc. I’m constantly sharpening the knife for the day I get to stab… and stab, and stab, and stab, stab, stab, stab-STAB. ‪#‎Skeet‬ I do my job not for the money but to stay alive. I find my pulse and a sense of purpose living in a war-zone. The only thing that waits for me in America is Disappointment and Poison. ‪#‎NotThe80sBand‬
In some ways I actually envy the Booger Eating Cave Monkeys. For in my opinion people from the Muslim world don’t get PTSD from War because everyone has the knowledge of living in a War-Zone. Muslims get PTSD from Freedom which is why many fail to integrate into Western societies, and try to bring Sharia Law to the streets of every nation they enter.
I think I just figured out how to solve my problem. I need to move to a war-zone in America. But where?… I got it!!! I’M MOVING TO DETROIT!!!!!‪#‎GeauxTigers‬!!!

With PTSD leading to a pandemic of Veteran suicide Im going to try to give insight by sharing my own struggles with realizing why I’ll never be as “cool” as I once was.

Its not that going to war is “cool” or that I am cool for that matter. In truth if your a fighting man, especially a United States Marine, war blows. You’re constantly on edge, Its extremely hot or cold, You live in a hole; and there is no women, booze or State-side Copenhagen. Oh, and you can die.

Although the thought of actually dying never really enters your mind when you’re in a fire fight. Your greatest fear is your brothers dying. So you shoot, move and do whatever it takes to ensure their survival. When it’s a good day you share stories afterward about Suzy Rottencrotch. If it’s a bad day you share silence.

I have had good days and I have had bad days all while I was a United States Marine. While I served I was thankful for my survival so that I could continue to protect my brothers and dream about going home to get my fill of Alcohol and Doxy(the navy’s cure all medicine for adult mono). I was respected, thanked and considered superhuman surrounded by brothers who would die for me. Now that I am a civilian I am resentful of that survival for now I think of my friends that I lost and continue to lose. I watch the slow decay of my body and know that I will one day die alone an irrelevant old man in a bed.

It’s not that life isn’t worth living it’s just that it’s not as exciting. It’s hard to go from running at the speed of light down to 55MPH. That’s why so many Vets try to find outlets that can recreate the thrill of combat. From BASE jumping to Free Basing, Cocaine. They are trying to ride the High of coming close to death. We don’t feel like we have mastered Death only our fear of Death. So now instead of walking on the Razors edge we cut ourselves with it.

So I guess that’s the problem. So what is the solution? In my opinion it’s not that easy. There is no one size fits all. The reality of it is most men who have faced death look at their life and re-evaluate whats important. In a society of vapid materialism offering us a job or saying thank you for your service seems hollow. When it feels like the government used the GWOT (Global War On Terror) to steal more freedom than it preserved. #FreeChelseaManning#PardonSnowden .So instead of looking for society to help the successful ones look for camaraderie and purpose to find peace. Since only the dead have seen the end of War, suicide is how 22 veterans a day find peace. #AlwaysBesidesYou #TillValhalla

There is so much talk about whether “We” America should intervene in Iraq. In my opinion there is no collective “we”. The fraction of the United States that served in the last 13 years is less than a percent and the amount that actually saw combat is infinitely smaller. The reasons that small percent was sent in to topple an Oppressive Dictator is highly contested, but the reality is we still ousted an asshole who enslaved and murdered millions. Many of us in the combat arms fields (including myself) re-enlisted to continue to serve, rebuild and give democracy and freedom to a people who were shit on for 30 years by an asshole. Now a new group of assholes has arisen and are committing horrible atrocities. All in a land where I watched my friends die trying to get the Arab world out of the Stone Age. What disgusts me is politicians weighing the political ramifications of whether or not to go in and help people being ethnically cleansed. These are the same people who pontificated the evils of “Bush” and “The War” from a safe air-conditioned office while my brothers and I were shot at in 120 degree heat. Needless to say I don’t give a fuck about their opinion because while they hold up signs that say ‪#‎BringBackOurGirls,‬ My brothers and I will hold our sites on our enemy ready to engage. The sad reality of it is, if “we” do go and send the Marines we will not fight to win. Our hands will be tied by the politicians who have no idea the true evils of our enemy. Tolerance, equality and winning the “hearts and minds” are nice ideas brought to you by modern society but when you deal with savages “2 in the heart and 1 in the mind” is the only way to solve the problem. In the past America did not to tolerate evil; We stamped it out with ruthless authority and made sure that it would Never rise again. The only way to truly solve the problem is to erase those animals from the annals of history and drag what is left into the 21st century.

“If you can’t stand to be by yourself other people probably can’t stand to be around you either.”- Carlos Aquino

The most important relationship that I have cultivated is the one I have with myself. Without having an honest relationship with myself I could never have an honest relationship with anyone. I cant put on aires, I can’t lie to impress, the only thing I can do is look in the mirror and evaluate what I see. What I see and what I have seen has changed from time to time, but the times where I saw something grotesque I didn’t run. I stood face to face with that demon and I worked with that sonava bitch and created someone I could take out in public. It taught me a few things.

1st It taught me that change takes time and discipline, and that journey also builds character.
2nd It taught me to forgive myself because I have collapsed multiple times only to raise myself from the ashes; Which never could have happened without forgiveness.

The times where I find myself doing the most vile soul staining things is when I like what I see because that good looking bastard in the mirror is confident and is well liked by everyone he meets. Beauty inspired confidence has that master key to unlock doors that are closed off to the rest of society. Anyone who has ever spent time in LA has seen that the most beautiful people can do the ugliest things. When I’ve walked too long in the shadows I can’t hide my sins on a painting I have stashed away in my attic. #PortraitOfDorianGrey Those sins rape my body and scar my face and the world of beauty gets farther out of reach. I become humble enough to recognize disfunction so that I wall myself away to recreate the person I love.

What helps give me this perspective and allows me the discipline to start the process over is staying true to my morals. Those morals that are unwavering have helped me cultivate real relationships with people who see me the same whether it’s in the light or darkness. Those friends have had the courage to have those hard conversations to tell me that I’m out of control, After which I go back to the mirror and realize that demon has finally manifested himself again.

Without those friends to give me that light I could easily continue to get lost with the demons in the darkness. But all my friends and family can do is give me a flashlight. I have to face my Demon and reclaim my life; no one can do it for me. So I start with isolation and develop a plan and forgive that guy in the mirror who has allowed me to live in such a selfish way for far too long. I stop all vices, pick up some books, hit the gym and in a few months I am reborn. Ultimately though, it makes me wonder who the Demon is; The manifestation of beauty or the diseased looking portrait of horror.

At this time I would like to apologize to anyone I have hurt while lost in the world and Shout out to all the different people in my life that have been there for me when I was in need. I would also like to thank the teachings of Christ who taught me to love everyone, stay humble and that salvation is never too late. Carlos Aquino who has walked through the valley of shadows with me and was able to expose my demons even though he was ignoring his own. And finally, Lindley Lehman, my best friend whose love has been the light that has led me out of the darkness.

I have many liberal friends and family who have loved and supported me through my adult life, Even though my politics and lifestyle are in direct contrast to their own beliefs. I really appreciate the dialogue we are able to maintain because it helps give me perspective and insight on the thoughts and beliefs that are held by many who live in my society. These civilized ideals are allowed to exist due to the cultural and intellectual freedoms that we enjoy in America. The assumption is often made that because of my military service and staunch patriotism that I have somehow “drank the kool-aid”. But make no mistake, my allegiance is not allocated to the US government. In fact, in all my years of service I never fought one day for the US Government. I fought for my brothers in arms, the Constitution, and the citizens of the United States.

The education I received from serving my country at war was not intellectual but rather primal. I was stripped of all material goods, personal identity and learned that the survival of the group super-cedes that of my own. I was placed in austere environments with only the bare essentials and any living condition was acceptable as long as the condition I was in was living. The positive take away from living in a world of constant survival is it gave me an understanding of nature and that beauty can be found in the simplest things. I learned how to love without awkwardness or fear and I cherish the people and ideals that matter most to my physical and mental health.

That love inspired tribalism is a very dangerous thing whether it’s wielded by “good or evil”. That seemingly conservative ultra-masculine survival mentality needed to be tempered by liberalism and femininity. Without that softer side of our nature we could never develop an appreciation for art, literature and diplomacy; which are the essentials for a civilized society.

The problem we face in American society today is that we are too far removed from the nature of survival. We spend most of our day looking to our phones for entertainment rather than looking for food. Religion is used as a talking point for interesting conversation at dinner as opposed to a personal relationship to something greater than yourself. And War is passively followed like a baseball team that you only check the paper to see the box scores. These are all the luxuries of living in a civilized liberal society.

If we faced boredom, hunger, and a stranger banging at our door in the night our view of the world would be very different. The evil we face is very much aware of the realities of nature and my liberal friends and family would like to think that this evil can be reasoned with. But how can you have a dialogue with a “civilization” that has enslaved their women and ruthlessly destroys opposing art/architecture, literature and faith?

In nature we look for balance but what we really find is chaos. So rather than ignore the natural world that exists outside our civilization, We should remember what it takes to survive in it. Sometimes survival means doing savage things.

April 9th marked the 2 year anniversary of my divorce. Which next to the birth of my kids was the greatest thing to ever happen to me. In all the process of recognizing being in a dysfunctional relationship and the steps it took to get out were hard steps to take. Counseling, Sobriety and medication all helped but in the end watching my daughter play with dolls where the mommy and daddy doll would fight, then the baby doll would cry for the daddy doll not to leave was the final step. I didnt want my children to use my ex-wife and I’s relationship as the standard to one day achieve.

While I was married my world was small, miserable and I fantasized about death everyday. Counseling helped me realize how much larger the world was and how much better of a father I could be by just setting the same example my mother set for me when I was 3.

I realized I had no choice.

Im not going to lie leaving was the hardest thing I had ever done(and Ive watched my friends die in combat) but here I am 2 years fully out of my marriage and I oddly enough have a better relationship with my ex then I ever had with her while we were married. I have a loving/supporting girlfriend who shows me what its like to feel loved and I get to take my kids on adventure’s as myself not as some caged lion.

Since my divorce Ive been climbing one hell of a mountain. Although I am not on top of that bitch yet and I admit I still have obstacles ahead.(Im in Fucking Afghanistan Currently for goodness sake) I can honestly say the view from where I am now is a helluva lot better than where I was.

The World is huge plan on conquering it not be crushed by it.

PS Thank you mother I love you.